July 01, 2004

Help Wanted: Millionaire to run for U.S. Senate 

Thought I'd see if the Illinois Republican Party might want me to run for the U.S. Senate, since they need a candidate speedy quick. I don't have any experience in politics, but that doesn't seem relevant these days. So what does it take to become a big-time candidate? You might think the qualifications would include things like vision and a thorough grounding in the issues facing Illinois, the nation and the world. Maybe deep personal commitment to serving the interests of the people, that kind of thing. "I think you've got to be a millionaire to run in this thing," says Champaign Mayor Jerry Schweighart, as reported by Tom Kacich in the Champaign-Urbana News Gazette. Champaign County Clerk Mark Sheldon sets the bar higher: "I just want a multigazillionaire who can finance his own campaign." I don't know how many zeros that is, but too bad for me because my fortune doesn't even reach 6 figures. However, the country has been manufacturing a record number of new millionaries over the past decade (along with lots of new poor people). And it's a good thing, because we really need more megamultirich people in elected office representing our interests.

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